HOW SINGLES WOMEN COULD RECOGNIZE FAKE SUITORS

Dear singles women, as you keep searching for life partners, below are some red flags or warning signals to identify or recognize fake suitors.

Proposal on a chopper

♂️ 1. SEX: All he wants from you is sex, sex and sex. Every time he meets you, it is sex he demands. If you refuse to yield to his sexual advances, he gets angry with you. If you open your legs for him, he is happy with you. Any man who demands for sex before marriage is a fake suitor. Run for your life..

♂️ 2. FAMILY INTRODUCTION: He is always postponing family introduction. Under normal circumstances, a man should introduce himself to a woman’s family within 3 months of any serious relationship. If you, as a lady, are in a relationship with a man and he keeps postponing or gives you flimsy excuses, he is not serious.

♂️ 3. WORK: The man you are dating does not have any specific job he is doing. He keeps promising you marriage but he is not working. He is not serious in starting something. He seems to have a dream but cannot start anything.

♂️ 4. MONEY: He is always asking you for recharged cards and money. He even gets angry with you if you don’t accede to his requests.

♂️ 5. MEETING: The guy meets you in hotels, friend’s place or restaurants. He refuses to give you his house address.

♂️ 6. LIES: He is full of lies. Everything he tells you cannot be relied upon.

♂️ 7. OTHER WOMEN: He has a job but flocks around with other women. He tells you those women are just friends. Sometimes when you visit him without notice, you find other women in his house.

♂️ 8. TELEPHONE CALLS: When he is with you, he switches off his mobile phones. He may even refuse to answer some calls if he is with you for fear of exposing his secret relationship with you. He padlocks his phones and you cannot have access to it.

♂️ 9. ATM CARDS: He maintains several bank accounts. He has over 10 ATM cards with different banks but his source of livelihood is shrouded in secrecy. He does not allow you to know his sources of incomes but keeps spending money lavishly at all times. Such a guy may be a criminal.

♂️ 10. FEAR: Anytime you are with him, he is always afraid of law enforcement agents. When he sees policemen around, he is not comfortable. He is always in a panic mood. He is restless any moment he sees policemen around. Such a guy may be a criminal.

🎯 11. IDENTIFICATION: He has different names he bears on his means of identification. If you ask him why he bears different names, he tells you that it does not matter.

🎯 12. STRANGE FRIENDS: He has strange friends around him. Some of his friends are people of questionable characters.

🎯 13. ASSAULTS: He is always abusing you even in the public. He molests you. He gets angry with you and starts insulting you. Later, he will apologize and still repeats same.

🎯 14. RAPE: On different occasions, he has raped you because you did not cooperate with him. After raping you, he apologizes and still continues to rape you. NOTE: This may sound strange but some ladies foolishly date rapists

🎯 15. RESPECT: He has no respect for you. He talks to you as if you are a slave yet he promised to marry you.

Love Happens

🎯 16. HAPPINNESS: He is always angry and fights you but the only time he is happy with you is during sexual intercourse. Immediately after sexual escapade, he starts insulting you. NOTE: This happens and any woman who continues with such a man is a big fool.

🎯 17. TRIBALISM: He hates your tribe. He detests your culture because he is from another tribe, yet he claims he loves you. NOTE: A man who loves you must love your tribe and cultures.

🎯 18. RELIGION: He practices another religion that is different from yours. He is an extremist but you don’t like his religion. NOTE: Marrying such a man is disastrous.

🎯 19. ALCOHOL: He is a terrible alcohol addict. He drinks himself to stupor and loses his senses anytime he is intoxicated. He apologizes later but still continues his alcoholism attitude.

🎯 20. SMOKING: He smokes weeds and cigarettes. You are not comfortable with smoking habits but you only want to manage him since there is no alternative. NOTE: You cannot cope with a smoker in marriage if you cannot cope with him now.

✓21. PROPOSAL: Since you have been dating, he has never proposed to marry you but keeps having sex with you. After sex, he pays you. NOTE: The man has turned you to a prostitute.

⭐ 22. ACCOMMODATION: He squats with friends. He has no plan of getting his own accommodation. You meet him in his friend’s house and he gets angry when you advise him to get his own accommodation.

Dear single women, this is New Year. A lot of men are destroying the lives of ignorant women. If you notice any or a combination of the above characters in man’s life, don’t take the risk of marrying such a man. Many women are regretting now in their homes as they failed to be sensitive to these warning signals.

BE WISE! ✨

May you not fall in love and fall into trouble. 🙏

Don’t forget to add yours via comment if there are others way to spot fake suitors

Seven (7) Steps To A New Habit

Here are Seven (7) Steps in developing a new habit and making it stays for life

1. First, make a decision.
Deciding what habit will make the biggest impact on your success is crucial. Don’t confuse urgent tasks with important ones.

2. Second, never allow an exception to your new habit pattern during the formative stages.

3. Third, tell others that you are going to begin practicing a particular behavior.

4. Fourth, visualize yourself performing or behaving in a particular way in a particular situation.

The 3 R’s Of Habit Formation

5. Fifth, create an affirmation that you repeat over and over to yourself.

6. Sixth, resolve to persist in the new behavior until it is so automatic and easy that you actually feel uncomfortable when you do not do what you have decided to do.

7. Seventh, and most important, give yourself a reward of some kind for practicing in the new behavior.

Old Habits Die Hard

Be A Woman Of Valor

A woman 𝗕𝗨𝗥𝗡𝗜𝗡𝗚 for God is not automatically destined to marry a pastor.

It’s not an error to walk in God out of pure 𝗟𝗢𝗩𝗘 without a ministerial call.

It has become an abomination in our generation for a lady to love God without a 𝗣𝗥𝗢𝗝𝗘𝗖𝗧𝗜𝗢𝗡 of marrying “Papa”.🤦‍♂️

Since when did chasing God become for a particular set of ladies?

See, God is not after raising pastors wives, He is raising 𝗟𝗢𝗩𝗘𝗥𝗦.

God is not just raising “Mamas”, He is raising 𝗕𝗨𝗥𝗗𝗘𝗡 𝗕𝗘𝗔𝗥𝗘𝗥𝗦.

A woman chasing after and loving God is not mummy G.O. She is just a lover of God and His presence!

Ma, you can be a house wife and still house the 𝗣𝗥𝗘𝗦𝗘𝗡𝗖𝗘 of God.

You can be a banker and still save this generation from 𝗣𝗘𝗥𝗜𝗦𝗛𝗜𝗡𝗚.

Please listen ma, you can be a secondary school teacher and still invoke a heavenly 𝗖𝗨𝗥𝗥𝗜𝗖𝗨𝗟𝗨𝗠.

You can be a senator and still 𝗟𝗘𝗚𝗜𝗦𝗟𝗔𝗧𝗘 against the kingdom of 𝗗𝗔𝗥𝗞𝗡𝗘𝗦𝗦.

You can be a business woman and still do business with 𝗜𝗠𝗠𝗢𝗥𝗧𝗔𝗟𝗦 Ma!!🔥🔥🤷‍♂️

Please know that you don’t have to be a mummy G.O to 𝗧𝗥𝗔𝗩𝗔𝗜𝗟 for revival in your generation.

You can be in the United Nations and still tarry for the 𝗨𝗡𝗜𝗧𝗬 of the body of Christ

“Mama” mustn’t be added to your name to become a 𝗠𝗢𝗧𝗛𝗘𝗥 in Israel .

𝗠𝗔𝗥𝗬 never handled any microphone.

𝗘𝗦𝗧𝗛𝗘𝗥 was not a mummy G.O.

𝗥𝗨𝗧𝗛 never knew the road to the pulpit.

𝗗𝗢𝗥𝗖𝗔𝗦 was not the women’s leader.

Yet, they changed the tides of history.

𝗕𝗨𝗥𝗡 wherever you are!!!🔥

WHAT TO DO WHEN YOUR SPOUSE IS SUSPECTING YOU

Over the weekend, I saw a movie. The movie centres around a couple and their friends.

I don’t know the name of the movie, in case you want to ask for the name, forgive me. I just watched the movie.

So in the movie, the wife was always suspecting the husband of infidelity even when there was no evidence to substantiate her claims.

She accused the man of having an affair with his female colleagues and with her friend too.

She was always following the man around and snooping around his phone and this suspicion was a constant source of conflicts.

It got to a point, the woman started to get violent physically, she even stabbed the man on one occasion.

So the man couldn’t take the whole stress the wife was causing him, consequently he filed for a divorce.

Fortunately, due to intervention from friends and family and after realizing what being suspicious can do to a marriage, she changed and the marriage was saved eventually.

#CheatingSpouse

I want to draw a few issues from this story…

1. Why your spouse is suspecting you

a. Lack of trust

Probably due to her previous relationships, how she was disappointed, and betrayed she finds it hard to trust anyone again.

Or maybe you’ve done something previously or are doing something presently that made her not to trust you.

Lack of trust will always lead to suspicion.

b. Insecurity

Insecurity is another major sponsor of suspicion. When one is not confident about himself or herself, being suspicious will be the natural outcome.

When one does not feel good about himself or herself, when one is always feeling unworthy and undeserving, suspicion will always be there.

c. Jealousy

Excessive jealousy is the offspring of insecurity. When one comes to understand your value and worth, they may not want to lose you to someone else.

When someone is not confident about himself or herself, about his or her value and worth, jealousy will come naturally and that will often lead to suspicion.

Let me make something clear here, love comes with a healthy dose of jealousy. If you say you love someone and don’t feel a moderate jealousy from time to time, your love may be questionable.

Even if you are Mr confidence itself, something must move inside of your inside.

2. What to do when your spouse is suspicious of you

a. Be truthful

Trust is not a gift. It’s earned and being truthful is one of the ways to earn trust.

Nothing kills trust like lies. When you always tell a lie, don’t expect anyone to trust you.

Let your yes be yes and your no be no. Go where you said you will be going, do what you say you will be doing. Don’t say A and do B without giving a satisfactory explanation.

b. Be transparent

Transparency fosters trust. Be open with your dealings. He that must be trusted must show himself trustworthy.

When your phone is a no go area, you lock it with password, finger and face recognition and your partner doesn’t know your password, when you hide to receive and make calls, and when your partner can’t answer your phone, don’t expect a trust. You’re not being transparent.

When there’s nothing to hide, when there’s no hide and seek games, you make it easy for your partner to easily trust you.

c. Assure the person

When your partner is always suspecting you, another thing you can do and that’s if you’re clean is to keep assuring the person.

To assure someone means to give the person confidence, to comfort, to cheer, to reassure etc. So always assure your partner that nothing is going on. Give the person assurance.

Don’t just say it also do it. Giving assurance helps to boost trust.

d. Help the person to see his or her worth

Like I said before, when someone is not confident about himself or herself, his value and worth, the person will trouble your life with suspicion.

When a person doesn’t feel good about himself or herself, they will tend to derive their value and worth from being associated with you, therefore they will guide you jealously because you make them feel valuable and good about themselves.

So help the person to be confident about themselves, help them to see their value and worth. Let them know that in and of themselves, they are valuable and worthy. They don’t have to depend on others for their value and worth.

Do this and you will be you did. Remember, trust is not a gift. You have to earn by being trustworthy.

Thanks for readings

13 TOXIC HABITS THAT DESTROY SUCCESS

1. Fear – Fear of failure makes failure more likely. Fear of failure is a prison, it locks you in, preventing you from venturing outside your comfort zone.

2. Lack of Purpose – Lack of purpose can trigger depression or anxiety. Without a purpose, you can never scale any achievements because you can struggle to find the motivation to try anything new.

3. Inconsistency – Living a life with no consistency is a recipe for disaster. Inconsistency is one of the biggest time wasters. No one will pay attention to you if you are consistently inconsistent.

4. Indiscipline – Indiscipline affects you very badly. If you are indiscipline with time, you cannot be productive and cannot be respected by people. Indiscipline affects your personality and cause you not to progress in the mind. Sometimes the failures or dissatisfactions and tragedy you experience in life are caused by indiscipline.

5. Procrastination – Procrastination diverts time away from important or necessary tasks and spends it on less important activities. Procrastination is associated with a variety of dangers and negative effects, including worse academic performance, worse financial status, increased interpersonal relationship issues, reduced wellbeing, and worse mental and physical health.

6. Lack of confidence – When you lack confidence, you spend more time thinking and worrying about what other people are doing than focusing on your own competence and potential. This focus on others robs you of the positive energy you need to fuel your ambition and reach your objectives.

7. Lack of motivation – Without motivation, you cannot achieve anything. There are no goals to aim for and no purpose to strive towards.

8. Poor communication skills – Ineffective communication can lead to many misunderstandings or disagreements, too. This can include making mistakes or completing tasks incorrectly, having your feelings hurt, causing arguments, or distancing yourself from others.

9. Poor relationship skills – People with poor relationship skills are more likely to exhibit lowered self-worth and confidence. It also increases self-doubt, helplessness, fear, anxiety, depression, insecurity, paranoia, as well as decreased motivation and productivity

10. Jealousy – Jealousy rises when your own deeper yearnings aren’t being met, and you become envious of what another person has, how they are, or what they do. However, it can grow into resentment and bitterness which are dangerous to your health and success.

11. Covetousness – Covetousness is as deadly as any other sins. It will induce others self-destructive and toxic habits. It generates a destructive radiation with ill effect on anything it touches.

12. Complaints – Complaining about your problems keeps your attention on your problems. If you want to attract failure, talk about your problems. But if you want to attract success, talk about what makes you happy.

13. Dishonesty – Lies beget lies. To validate a lie, you have to tell another lie. To make that lie seem feasible, you have to tell two more lies. To make those lies seem believable, you have to tell even more lies until you ruin your personal reputation.

10 THINGS YOU SHOULD NEVER CALL YOUR SPOUSE

1. NARCISSIST
This is one of the most abused words used these days. People are quick to call their spouse a narcissist. The moment you tell your spouse he/she is this, you are passing judgment and might discourage your spouse from putting effort in becoming better

2. FOOLISH
Even if your spouse makes some bad choices, don’t make your spouse feel stupid by name calling. It doesn’t rectify the issue

3. CHILDISH
Just because you know more about a matter than your spouse doesn’t give you the right to make your spouse feel lesser. Love is teaching your spouse what you know

4. UNGODLY
Don’t dare think you are closer to God than your spouse because you sin different, you pray longer, you know more Bible verses or you are more active in Church. You don’t lead your spouse closer to God by coming off superior. Where is your humility? Don’t call your spouse devil or devil’s agent just because your spouse has fallen

#CoupleGoals

5. FAILURE
Just because your spouse has had a string of disappointments, closed doors and rejection does not mean you make it worse and call your spouse a failure. Don’t beat your spouse down when he/she is already down

6. BURDEN
Don’t make your spouse feel like a load to carry. If you will help your spouse and keep calling your spouse names then don’t help at all. Your support should come from your heart, not with insults

7. REGRET
When you call your spouse a regret you made, you are passing judgment also to yourself – you chose your spouse. If you feel marrying your spouse was a regret, why are you continuing in regret? End the marriage instead of insulting your spouse

8. PROSTITUTE
Just because you suspect your spouse of cheating or have caught your spouse cheating doesn’t mean you call your spouse all manner of names. Yes, you are angry, but is your anger helping the situation or making it worse? Your spouse fell, it is for you two to decide, does this mean the end of your marriage or will you two work things out?

9. NOT MAN ENOUGH
Just because your man has fallen short, doesn’t mean you make him feel inadequate. This is not how to bring out the best in him

10. UGLY
Don’t insult your spouse’s body then expect that same body to give you great sex. Grow up

Name calling only worsens the condition of your marriage, it is a form of emotional abuse and discourages team work. Are the words you are saying building or destroying your marriage?

To Every Single Lady’s

DEAR SINGLE LADY:

I beg you from my heart and for your future sake to please adhere to these few instructions.

✓ Never love a man that does not love you in return.

✓ Never try to change your man’s lifestyle. You can’t change a grown man, that is the work of the Holy Spirit (2 Corin. 5:17). Always pray for him if you are convinced that you both can make a Godly home.

✓ Never give your man sex to show how much you love him, sex can never equate love (Premarital sex kills relationship)

✓ Never hope on your man for financial freedom, we all need support.

✓ Never stop praying and trusting God for the right man, only God can bring him to you.

✓ Never trust in your beauty, it’s only character that can keep you in marriage. Don’t be deceived, real men prefer respect to beauty (Prov. 31:30)

✓ Never try to please your man, be yourself and involve him in proactive communication so as to know him better before marriage.

✓ Never compare him with your ex: he is not your ex. Give him the due respect for his own uniqueness.

✓ Never try to lead him no matter your temperament demand. Remember: Men are configured by God to lead their wives.

✓ Plan less for your wedding day and more for your marriage life, wedding is a day event but marriage is for life.

✓ Don’t allow anyone to compel you to marry a man you are not sure of. Marriage is by choice and not by force.

✓ Never abandon God in any relationship you find yourself. Remember, God knows him more than you do.

http://www.facebook.com/heartbuddies

6 SKILLS YOU SHOULD HAVE FOR YOUR MARRIAGE TO SUCCEED

💕1) Communication Skills

Not everyone that CAN talk knows HOW to talk, and not every one that CAN listen (possesses functional ears) knows HOW to listen. Some are good at talking, but bad at listening, some are bad at both, a few are good at both. You need a balance, you need to TALK TO and LISTEN TO your partner in the right way if your marriage will follow the right way.

🙏2) Forgiving Skills

A Great marriage consists of 2 Great Forgivers.
As long as you married a human being, and you are a human being yourself, offense will come, you’ll offend each other consciously and unconsciously. The ability to forgive offenses as they come (without seeking revenge) will save you and your partner heartaches and save your marriage from Malice and Bitterness.

💕3) Apologizing Skills

“I AM SORRY” Those three words can go a long way to salvage your marriage and cut short certain problems before they start and escalate.. You should be so good at apologizing that you can apologize even when you are not at fault just for peace to reign. Welcome to Marriage.

Successful Marriage

♂️ 4) Letting Go Skills

It’s not everything you see your partner do or hear them say that you react to. SOMETIMES you ignore as if you didn’t see or hear. Don’t let your wahala be like bicycle, easy to start.. Be good at Forbearing, you’ll need this especially when dealing with your partners weaknesses (everybody has theirs).

😊 5) Having Fun Skills

What is Marriage without Fun and Friendship?
Always squeezing your face like someone that is licking lime will not help anybody. Some Men, their wives can’t even joke with them, wetin happen? It’s Marriage, not Wrestling. Don’t carry your age, class, status, anointing, achievements and enter your marriage space, become a friend and lover once you get home to your partner. Keep your TITLE in the office, otherwise your marriage will become a BATTLE.

😘 6) Selflessness Skills

One of the challenges with Marriage is Selfish People. What will I gain? “If I give him a foot massage, what will he give me in return?” “If I wash the plates, what will she do?” Always keeping scores. Doing things to get things in return. Only doing things if you (will) get something in return, Don’t make this your mentality.

5 Things Sex Doesn’t Do

Dear Dating Couple

Don’t be Deceived.
Sex Sex Sex… Is not the way out

5 THINGS SEX DOESN’T DO.

1) Sex doesn’t Strengthen a Relationship.

A Relationship that is weak is weak not because there is no sex in it, but because there is no LOVE (affection, attention), COMMUNICATION and COMMITMENT in it..

“Sex is not Love”

Adequate daily Communication, giving Attention to each other (hanging out, spending time together) and showing Affection (speaking each other’s love language) for each other strengthens Relationships.

2) Sex doesn’t Spice up a Relationship

You would here stuff like “let’s spice our relationship with sex”

A Relationshp is boring not because of a lack of Sex, but because of a lack of purpose, life, fun, friendship and excitement in the lives of those in it.

3) Sex doesn’t Prove Love

Ndi “if you love me, prove it”

Sex is not a way you prove your love for anyone, especially someone you’re not married to, in fact, abstinence is a better prove of love than sex.

Your ability to wait is a proof of true LOVE than your inability to wait which is rather a proof of LUST.

A Person can have sex with you and not love you.

4) Sex doesn’t Keep a Relationship

Ndi “I don’t want to lose him”

You can give him/her sex and they’ll will still dump you tomorrow, I counsel victims of this daily.

Even with good sex, marriages still break down everyday, talk less of a relationship

What keeps a relationship is LOVE, RESPECT, CHARACTER, and COMMITMENT

5) Sex doesn’t Prove that you’re a mature adult

Ndi “We’re matured adults, let’s do it.”

When did sex become the sign of matured adults?.

Immature and irresponsible teenagers have sex everyday, does that make them adults?

Sex doesn’t mean you’re matured, rather you prove your maturity by discipline and self control.
********************
Dear Single in a Relationship.
Sex Has its Time

Wait, in the right season, na you go tire..

Keep sex out of your Relationship and build a solid foundation for your Marriage.

4 MISTAKES WE SHOULD NEVER MAKE WHEN WE LOVE SOMEONE

When you love someone, you shouldn’t do certain things that would make you lose that person. Losing someone you love can be a painful ordeal because you might never get them back.
When we’re in love with someone, there are certain mistakes that are just too costly, because it might just cost us that relationship; we might forever lose that loved one and some people are just irreplaceable.
People prefer to learn from their own mistakes but I think some mistakes shouldn’t even come close to our relationship.

1. ANGER
Anger is a big relationship killer; we are humans and we get angry, anger is a common emotion. But the mistake people make is letting anger get the better of them; when you let anger becloud your judgment, your relationship would suffer for it and you would end up making so many mistakes that would just be a big minus.

2. PRIDE
Some people are too proud to show their emotions and they end up losing someone they actually do care about. If you love someone, tell that person, show that person, else your relationship might suffer for it. Sometimes these three words “I love you” can make a huge significance in your relationship but people take this for granted.

Love & Mistakes

3. DON’T TAKE THAT PERSON FOR GRANTED
Sometimes people do this, not because they don’t love their partner but because they feel that the person they love would never leave, so they take things for granted till that loving partner gets tired of the relationship and deem it over. When someone you love loves you greatly, never take it for granted because you might end up losing that person, and that would be a great loss.

4. NEVER FAIL TO APOLOGISE
“I am sorry” are three words that can save a relationship. So many relationships have failed because people lack this apologetic manner. People do things and still don’t care; being sorry for your wrong no matter how little would calm the tension surrounding relationships. You would gain a lot of respect from your partner when you sincerely apologise for your mistakes.

If you have been making these mistakes in your relationship, it’s time to grow up; that’s if you value that relationship.

11 SERIOUS QUESTIONS YOU MUST ASK THAT LADY BEFORE YOU MARRY HER

Marriage they say is not always a bedrock of roses nor a joke! Who you marry determines how your life eventually turns out. Your rising or crashing in life is determined the day you walk down the aisle with that woman so you can’t afford to pick another man’s bone. Here are the questions you must ask to see if your marital destiny is going towards the same direction.

1. WHAT IS HER VISION? Your wife must help you fulfil your vision that is why she is called an help-meet. If her dream is to become an international super nude model while your dream is to become a local full time Pastor, you will to do well to end the relationship!

2. IS SHE REALLY BORN AGAIN? Forget about religion. I’m talking about Christ-like behavior, attitude and character. Some ladies can tie scarf 24/7 yet the poison in them is deadlier than the serpent’s! If her character does not tally with that of a true child of God, you need to do a re-think!

3. IS SHE A VIRGIN OR NOT? You should find out to know what to expect on the wedding night and how to prepare for it.

4. DOES SHE HAVE AN EX? And what led to the break up so she won’t repeat the same mistake in your relationship. If she still keeps a close relationship with her EX, she needs to choose between you and him. No rivalry is allowed in any relationship that will last.

5. HAS SHE BEEN SEXUALLY ABUSED/ ASSAULTED/RAPED? Abused women have complicated emotions and relationships. They suffer unexplainable mood swings, depression, paranoia and in extreme cases psychosis and neurosis. They seriously have anger and trust issues. You need to find out so you can know how to relate with her in marriage. Better still, she needs to go for therapy before marriage.

6. DOES SHE HAVE A CHILD IN HER PAST? You must accept her child as your own now that you are getting married to her. If you can’t and she insists her child must live with her in marriage, you don’t belong together. End the relationship!

7. WHAT DOES MARRIAGE MEAN TO HER? Real marriage means companionship, deep sharing and friendship. If all she wants to do is have sex, cook and bear your children, she is not ready for marriage, both of you should go for counseling.

8. WHAT DOES SUBMISSION TO A HUSBAND MEANS TO HER? A wife must submit to her husband as the head in marriage. That is what the Holy Book says. If she is a feminist and you hate feminism with passionate hatred, you don’t belong together, end the relationship!

9. DOES SHE BELIEVE IN WORKING AFTER MARRIAGE OR SHE WANTS TO BE A FULL TIME HOUSE WIFE? Iron this out so you won’t be shocked if she resigned from her job after her first pregnancy and refuse to do anything else aside cooking and bearing children.

10. WILL ANY OF HER FAMILY MEMBERS BE LIVING WITH YOU AFTER MARRIAGE? Talk. Find out if you can cope with her siblings or parents living with you immediately after wedding. If you honestly can’t, talk about it!

11. WHAT IS HER VIEW ABOUT MONEY? Some women believe money is meant to be spent while some believed it is to be saved. A lot of others believe in accumulating liabilities. Though the right way to handle money is earn, save, invest and give. Spending should follow budget. What is your own way of handling money? Make sure your view on money tallies lest you end up in the divorce court few years after marriage.

These and more are the serious questions you should ask your partner before saying “I DO”. Amos 3:3 is a proof of God’s will.

If you claim you heard God and both of you are not ending the same direction, you need to pray again. God’s will is not an excuse to walk in foolishness.

Yes, you must marry God’s will for your life and your God’s will must give you peace. If you are scared, troubled and your relationship is going no where to happen, end it before it ends you.

I miss your voice because it is a symphony; your scent because it is a treasure; your smile because it is a jewel; your hug because it is a masterpiece; and your kiss because it is a miracle.

https://www.goodreads.com/quotes/tag/courtship-quotes

May the Lord grant you understanding. Thanks for reading. God bless you. Cheers! 🥂

Eleven (11) Wrong Things Singles Do In Relationships

1. Making an oath or blood covenant as a promise to marry each other. That’s cultism or ritual. Relationship doesn’t need initiation. Run!

2. Asking or pressuring for sex before marriage, asking for your nude pictures, phone sex, smooches, etc. Your body is the temple of God, “give not that which is holy unto dogs”, Matthew 7: 6.

3. Making your partner next-of-kin to all your documents and assets while you both are still single. This is risky!!! What if the marriage does not hold; then your assets or vital documents might be at great risk if he or she becomes fraudulent or elope with your documents. That’s why it’s only after marriage that you both can be next-of-kin to each other.

4. Living or cohabiting with your partners. If you both are serious, love and really want to marry; you both should patiently do the needful. Ensure you have at least a reliable source of income.

5. Getting pregnant to put your partner in the family way by force. Pregnancy is not enough reason for marriage. Marriage should be by God’s will and love.

6. Men, not paying that lady’s bride price you put in the family way is bad, ungodly and against our culture. I know a couple of singles that were put in the family way and till today their bride prices have not been paid. That’s a potential kidnap or modern day slavery. Please go and pay her bride price so you can receive God’s and her parents blessings.

7. Some guys may always ask or force a lady to withdraw all her money or salary into his account; and that if she needs money he’ll be giving her from his account. Sister, you don’t have control over your money again! Ask him, is he the Central Bank of your life? You’re still single and you should be in control of your money. While single, the best you can do is help or support each other financially if need be. There was a time a guy killed his partner because she refused to buy something for her.

8. Forcing you to marry him or her because he’s or she’s sponsoring your education, business, or spending lavishly on you, etc. Marriage is not by force but by God and love. Once you notice that, I’ll advice you call him or her and let them know you’re not interested in marriage for sponsoring you so he or she can take right decision early less he or she lose his money further.

9. Threatening you with death or to attack you if you don’t marry, have sex or be in a relationship with him. Report to your parents, counselor or police.

10. He’s abusing you physically like a pouch bag and still asking you to stay. Sister run for your life less they carry your corpse.

11. You both are in a relationships but in his or her mind you’re a contract lover, so he or she alone can get visa to relocate abroad or get somethings (status, position, contract, etc) to his or her advantage. Without having plans for you, what becomes of you. He might promise to come back to Nigeria to pick you later, this worked for some while some it didn’t work. Some got there and that’s the end you heard of them, while some came back. Lots of relationships/marriages in which this didn’t work out have broken. A lot of singles though claim they do this for love, anyway just be wise. Am not saying you shouldn’t help someone travel out but don’t be greedy or fraudulent around it. The plan should be for you both if you genuinely love him or her.

My dear singles, I’ll conclude with this: “Trust in the LORD with all thine heart; and lean not unto thine own understanding. In all thy ways acknowledge him, and he shall direct thy paths. Be not wise in thine own eyes: fear the LORD, and depart from evil”. Proverbs 3: 3-7. A word is enough for the wise.

©Abiodun Aremo, 2019.
Blissful Relationship Int’l.
Right Sexuality Network
Covenant Family Ministries.